A Brief Review of Remove My Stretch Marks (.com)

closePlease note: This post was published over a year ago, so please be aware that its content may not be quite so accurate anymore. Also, the format of the site has changed since it was published, so please excuse any formatting issues.

A stomach with no stretch marksHave you noticed a heck of a lot of banner ads for the website RemoveMyStretchMarks.com? I sure have, so I decided to visit the site and see what all the fuss was about.

Oh, that picture to the right? Yeah, it has nothing to do with the website in question; it’s just a nice looking stomach.

The first gigantic red flag I discovered upon visiting the site was the author, Joyce Shaw, claimed to be from Spokane, WA (emphasis theirs). Really? I’m from Spokane too! That seemed kind of suspicious, so I visited the page via a proxy server, and suddenly Joyce wasn’t from Spokane anymore.

Hmm. Can I really trust Joyce? Is she even the real author of the website? A WHOIS search shows that Drew Marcin from Oshawa, Ontario in Canada is the owner of the site. That doesn’t mean that he’s the author, but maybe we can trust him. Oh, maybe not. So wait, does the owner of andrew_x_@hotmail.com live in Canada or Puerto Rico?

That’s 2 big red flags. The next one is “Joyce’s” product reviews. “#1 Cosmetyn! A++++-++!!!!1!1!!! Holy bananas, did this work wonders! Buy some today! And, oh yeah, I tried this other thing called Captiva or something. Don’t buy that, it sucks.” Alright, alright, those aren’t the actual product reviews, but a slightly embellished, paraphrased version. I would argue, however, that my version maintains the spirit of the original.

The verdict here is that I don’t know what to think of all of this, but I do find it difficult to believe that Joyce Shaw, 32 year old mother of 2 from Spokane, WA has the time and technical wherewithal to put this together, and then launch an expensive marketing campaign to get her banner ads everywhere on the Internet. Even if Cosmetyn works as well as this site purports (and it may, I’m not passing any judgment on the product), there’s enough dodgy stuff going on here to dissuade me from believing the site’s claims.

Postscript: I will concede that andrew_x_@hotmail.com may not be that Puerto Rican kid, as on another page of his the address is listed as andrew_x_9@hotmail.com. Also, it’s worth noting that Joyce Shaw has both a Gmail e-mail address and AIM account. I would be interested in the results of someone attempting to contact Joyce via AIM and seeing if she can pass the Turing test (or keep her story straight).

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  1. Never heard of this site (thank you, AdBlock). So I go there and I see:

    Thank you for coming to my website! My name is Joyce Shaw and I’m from .

    It looks like there is supposed to be something there before the period, right? ^_^ Open up the source and I find:

    “Thank you for coming to my website! My name is Joyce Shaw and I'm from <script src=’http://promos.fling.com/geo/txt/location.php’></script>.”

    Ah, maybe the script didn’t run on my computer? I went to the location.php and I found:

    document.write(“Valley, WA”);

    So, apparently I’m in Valley, WA (except I’m not).

    So this retrieves that bit of code which writes the location information. Except it either doesn’t work on Firefox at all, or it doesn’t work with my collection of extensions (I tried it with noscript disabled, and it still failed, although it does work as intended in IE).

    Now, fling.com is apparently a dating website or something? “Hook up with sexy singles looking for fun adult dating on Fling.com!”

    Do they know that “Joyce” is using their script? On their host?

  2. melissa

    I live in windham too and it isn’t workin’ for ya!!!!!!

  3. Did my comment go to your spam folder again? I gotta watch my language or something. ^_^

  4. Well found, Phoenix.

    I have noticed that certain regions fail to register, so I suspect that fling.com bought a limited list of geo-ip addresses.

    It also appears that the code wasn’t written properly, since it’s returning (what is probably) “Spokane Valley, WA” as simply “Valley, WA.”

  5. Actually Valley is a town in Washington, up past Loon Lake, before Chewellah. I know that I am in Pullman and those geo tags, depending on where my internet is being routed through, often say “Find singles in Chicago!” hahaha.

  6. Bree

    LOL I went there and it says she’s joyce shaw from san diego. Im from san diego. Thats pretty pathetic! Yeah, I wouldn’t trust cosmatyn. I think I have come to terms that I’m 20 and will never wear a bikini, and the only thing that works is laser and even thats not a guarentee. Instead of tying to cure them, we should ban together and make them the sexiest thing in the planet. Stretchmarks (beauty marks) are HOTTTT

  7. John

    He lives in Canada – here is boasting about how much money he is making by scamming people with his fake blog:


    These fake blog scams are everywhere:



  8. I’m the girl with the nice looking stomach. I clicked the links on that website, it said the product wasn’t available in my area (naww) and redirected me to http://:///://. Come on Joyce, where’s the love?!

  9. Well, Kitta, all I can say is MEOW! I finally looked through the other images in your set and damn! You’re pretty hot. -)

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