When Tom Cruise began dating Katie Holmes, we all just assumed it was some kind of publicity stunt. When they got engaged, we figured he was having a mid-life crisis. But recently, Tom Cruise was on the Today show and he finally let us see the cards in his hand. As it turns out, he was bluffing.
He’s fucking nuts.
Now, I don’t mean that in a “I’m going to sue you for libel” kind of way. What I mean is that some of the things he’s been saying and doing lately have left me (and a lot of other people) wondering about his sanity.
It all started back on Oprah. Tom Cruise was on the show talking about… Well, no one really remembers what he was actually there for, because the topic was completely overshadowed by his “couch surfing” antics. The event was the scuttlebutt of the nation and eventually (almost predictably), led to this video clip.
Next, Tom Cruise appeared on The Today Show, where Matt Lauer attempted to interview him. At first, the interview was quite light; they chatted about Cruise’s upcoming film and his engagement to Katie Holmes. Then, in a later segment, Matt Lauer brought up Scientology and Cruise’s recent condemnation of Brooke Shields and her decision to go on anti-depressants as a method of dealing with her postpartum depression.
Things turned very, very dark.
The formerly jovial Tom Cruise donned a mask of terror (did his face remind anyone else of his saggy face in Minority Report?) and attacked Matt Lauer for being uninformed. Lauer continued trying to ask questions and illicit some sort of logical answer from Cruise, but no answer could be found.
This is, I suspect, because no logical answer exists. As my friend Kris pointed out, Scientology, like many other religions, has some good ideas and some fucking weird ones (to paraphrase both Kris and Eddie Izzard). For example, Scientology teaches that many of our problems are caused by the spirits of space aliens that have become stuck in our bodies [SOURCE]. I mean, come on! I want to believe just as much as the next guy, but even Fox Mulder would be ashamed.
Cruise continued to attack Matt Lauer, making such ambiguous arguments as, “You don’t know…I do.” In fact, Cruise successfully avoids answering any of Lauer’s questions and merely preaches for the rest of the interview. He goes on accuse Lauer of being “glib” and irresponsible, “when you don’t know about it and I do”.
Cruise’s hypocrisy managed to shine through multiple times during the interview, but my favourite is the one that appears below.
But a little bit of what you’re saying Tom is, you say you want people to do well. But you want them do to well by taking the road that you approve of, as opposed to a road that may work for them.
Cruise: No, no, I’m not.
Lauer: Well, if antidepressants work for Brooke Shields, why isn’t that okay?
Cruise: I disagree with it.
It’s clear that there’s just no reasoning with Tom Cruise. Lauer did an applaudable job and managed to remain professional in the face of Cruise’s rude interjections and unfounded accusations.
Cruise can do all the research in the world, but how can he truly judge until he knows what it’s like? Has he been diagnosed with ADD? I have. I was diagnosed before it was the popular thing to do. I was on Ritalin for years, by my own free will, and it =does= work. At least, it did for me. How do you determine how much Ritalin to give a kid? I imagine it has something to do with age and weight, but as a general rule, start low and work your way up from there. Has Cruise ever had postpartum depression? We know that answer is no. Being sad is different from being depressed, and while vitamins and exercise might work to cure depression, quite often victims of depression don’t have the luxury of time. Without drugs, those who are truly depressed may hurt or even kill themselves or someone else. Yes, I agree that Paxil, Zoloft, and the like are just a mask; but sometimes that mask is required in order for people to clear their heads and realise what they need to do in order to fix their lives.
Moreover, vitamins =ARE DRUGS=! Many synthetic drugs are modeled off of vitamins. Anything that you ingest that changes your chemical balance is a drug. Just because vitamins are natural, doesn’t exempt them. What about marijuana? Or opium? Or cocaine?
And just who the hell does Tom Cruise think he is, anyway? Just because he had us at hello doesn’t mean he’s qualified to dole out health advice or tell us we’re all wrong because we don’t believe the same things he does. What he’s doing is slowly committing political suicide. It was the American public that gave him his wealth and power and we can just as easily take it away. Some people have even begun to boycott Cruise’s films as a way to act against him.
You know else I want to know? Where the hell was Katie Holmes for the two weeks before her and Cruise publicly professed their love? There are some pretty suspicious things going on there. All we can do is hope that she comes to her senses and breaks off the engagement before she’s trapped forever.
You know, I’ve said a lot of bad things about Tom Cruise in this piece, but to be fair, we should remember that above all else, Tom Cruise cares.